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HOME HOW CAN YOU HELP? Join us in Washington for the 7 Woman March! Tell a friend about this site! Read the Bible! Join our mailing list! Buy some swag! SaveMarthaStewart.com's Manifesto: Martha Stewart is Not an Unlawful Caterer! The Ashcroft Justice Department continues its disregard of the Constitution and all concepts of due process and tact when it accuses Martha Stewart of criminal wrongdoing. Martha's no criminal. Has anyone even bothered to look for the Satanic cult seen hanging around Connecticut stock broker's offices at the time? And so what if she lied to investigators? You can't make a souffle without breaking a few eggs, separating the egg-whites, and beating them until light and airy. And isn't that really what Martha's been accused of? Capitalism is messy. But with artfully appointed stock certificate doilies, it can at least be tasteful. Can't you see that Martha's tactful denials of insider trading are the more aesthetically pleasing version of reality? Obstruction of justice? Nonsense. Well-managed, catered entertaining of greater justice, absolutely. Obstruction of justice requires an on-going official investigation. The authorities were simply gauche for asking her annoying questions in the first place. What's more just than ensuring that unpleasant facts are downplayed by elegant shading and decorative eye-catching accessories? Stand up for Martha and show the feds that we won't stand for her persecution! Boycott American-made sauce pans! Send french toast to the Justice Department! Save Martha Stewart! Our Manifesto Arm yourself with knowledge! Martha Stewart Fact Sheet Biographical Timeline Legal Analysis by Johnnie Cochran Suggested Defense Strategies Latest News Investment Offer From Martha! Comments From Other Celebrities A Horrible Future! Other Marthas Who Have Been in Trouble Martha's Prison Pen Pals Martha Dot Fun! Martha's To-Do List Martha Haikus Related Websites Sign or View Our Guestbook!

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